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Today we’re going to look at three common and awkward arguments married couples have around money and how you can tackle them together!
Awkward Money Conversations When You’re Married
Marriage and money isn’t always easy. Chances are the two of you have different personalities and approaches to finances.
Those differences can be a wonderful thing as you two can lean on each other’s strengths and shore up weaknesses.
But finding your financial footing as a couple is not automatic. If you don’t have some way to work on it, it can hurt your marriage and money.
One of the first things to realize about why couples fight or argue over money is how frequently it’s actually NOT about the money. Seriously.
From personal experience, writing and speaking about this for over a decade, the most common reason couples fight about money is that they are not in sync with each other in either their expectations, values, or priorities. Usually it’s a combo of them.
While you two aren't always going to see eye to eye on everything – again those differences can be fantastic- there are some ways you can work as a team and use those differences to your advantage.
Today we’re going to talk about how you can use that knowledge to untangle some awkward money conversations that can come when you’re married!
In this episode we’ll get into questions like:
- figuring out what counts as a big purchase
- whether to loan money to family
- coming clean about debts
Resources to Build Up Your Family Finances Together
- Best Budget and Money Apps: Personal Capital, Tiller, Mint
- Grow Your Stash Faster: High Yield Savings with CiT Bank
- Jumpstart Your Marriage and Your Money
- Join Our Thriving Families Community on Facebook
- Her Dinero Matters Podcast
- His and Her Money Show
- How to Loan Money to Family (and Not Regret It)
- How to Deal with (and Overcome) Financial Infidelity
- 7 Common Money Arguments in Marriage
Thank You to Our Sponsor Coastal!
Support for this podcast comes from Coastal Credit Union! If you’re living in the Raleigh Durham area and looking to bank better, come check out Coastal today.
We’ve been Coastal members for a few years have been happy with their services.
Find out more about what Coastal offers here!
Key Takeaways on Dealing with Tough Money Chats
I want to share a few key takeaways I got from preparing this episode.
- Focus on being on the same team. Credit to Tai and Talaat from His and Her Money for this analogy. Just like on a cohesive sports team, as a couple you two have to find a way to play to one another’s strengths in pursuit of that shared goal.
- Discuss these scenarios and others that may come up and create a plan on how to deal with them together. Running these ‘what if’ scenarios can allow you to more objectively discuss how to handle these tricky situations. Not sure where to start? Try listening to a podcast or reading a story and if there’s an example, use it as a case study.
- Take a step back to reflect on where the two of you agree and where you disagree. Many times you two already agree on some points, so finding that line can make discussing it easier. Allow one another to bring up their take (perhaps using a timer) and why.
Just remember compatible doesn’t mean identical. You two will have different takes, viewpoints, and opinions. It’s about finding the best points from each and creating a plan you’re both on board with.
It's a four-week guide to get you two on the same page and set up an automatic and easy to maintain system that fits you and your goals.
Support the Podcast!
Thank you so much for listening to the podcast! If you enjoyed this episode and found it helpful, here are some ways to support it.
- Spread the word! If you enjoyed this episode and think it can help a buddy get on the path to dumping debt and become financially free, please share.
- Leave a review. Honest feedback and reviews make a big difference and gets the word out about the podcast. Leave your rating and review on Apple Podcasts.
- Grab a copy of Jumpstart Your Marriage and Your Money. My book is designed for a busy couple to set up their finances in 4 weeks. Get tips and tools that have worked for other couples on their journey of building their marriage and wealth together!